Wednesday, August 6
I chose the title of no title because there is nothing in particular on my mind that I feel to write about.I just want to do something that doesn't involve sitting on a sofa holding a book, phone, or a bottle of water. Yes, I am a totally bored individual. Sure, I could go outside in the f****** sweltering heat of where I am in Texas. Not going to do that though, because after having been out there in it for just a few minutes, slight exaggeration, it would probably be more like 10 or 15, I would be getting the feeling of total and overwhelming fatigue, which is different then just feeling a little more tired than usual. I have a link on my phone somewhere that explains the difference better than I can, but I can't seem to find it. It's easy enough to find on Google though. Sure I could also put on my cooling vest and go outside, but what would I do? Water my two plants that I have in a couple of pots, and the two plants that are in front of the porch, but then what? I am also fighting with depression. I was on the generic version of Prozac for several years, but weaned myself off of it several months ago because I felt it was no longer working for me. Rather than talking with my neurologist about it though, I thought I could just work through this sadness by thinking happy thoughts like I heard I should do from several well meaning friends. However, I have an appointment with my neuro next month and talking about my depression is on the list. I will also be talking with him about being fitted for an AGO, ankle foot orthosis, or in layman's terms, a brace to help with walking for people who have foot drop, which I do. I kept hoping that it would miraculously get better if I did leg or ankle exercises, but I'm starting to feel like that was just wishful thinking. My boredom could possibly be relieved by practicing my learning of crochet that a friends talked me into trying. She even sent me some yarn and needles a few months ago. I attempted for a little while after I first got the tools, but I admit that I become totally and completely frustrated with my suckiness at it and blamed my poor dexterity. I've been hesitant to try again. But I'm feeling a little guilty for not trying harder.