Sunday, May 12

Discouraged with my physicallity

Okay, it's official... I'm discouraged in that I'll be able to walk normally (without limping or wobbling due to balance issues). As you know, I've been having a lot of trouble walking for about a week now. Prior to that I was walking pretty well. I could actually go up and down stairs most of the time without my left leg shaking because my calf muscle would spasm. My thigh muscle was doing it's job fairly well in lifting my foot off of each step as I went up. Then last week I tripped on the last step of a flight of stairs, twisted my ankle and landed sideways on my left hand thus straining a finger on said hand that was carrying something (which I didn't drop. FYI). Ever since then my left ankle doesn't seem to be regaining is strength, so my ankle-muscle is unstable and easily twists if I'm not real careful, and my knee feels like there's no muscles in it. Now when I walk, my left foot often drags on the ground and my left thigh muscle quivers as I lift my leg/knee/foot, thus causing me to trip easier than usual (as seen in the video in my last entry). Not only that, but because my equilibrium is all fucked-up it's as if I have no balance (like a sober drunk might be).

Oh, and the reason I'm discouraged is because I went to the exercise room here at the apartment complex just a little while ago thinking I would try to exercise my legs (mostly my left). Anyway, I rode a stationary bike for a few minutes and the whole time my left leg shook as though the muscles were too weak. Same thing on The Elliptical machine, so I wobbled back to the apartment feeling somewhat depressed because it felt like a waste of time trying to exercise. The only thing that gives me some hope is that prior to last week I didn't walk too bad. So I'm hoping that my left ankle will get stronger, my calf muscle will stop being sore and that my left knee becomes more stable in the next few weeks.

Saturday, May 11


This is how I've been walking for the last week/week and a half. It sucks. This happens occasionally, like once a year or so and lasts for about 6 weeks (give or take). It's why I need to make a t-shirt that says, "I'm NOT drunk, I have MS!" lol

Watch it here...

Wednesday, May 8


just published a v-blog on YouTube. You can watch it at

Monday, May 6

Phone blog

I had a pretty good day today. uh took one of the girls to a dentist at 9 o'clock. went to McDonalds twice today, and didn't have to pay for either one. I was pleasantly surprised. thank you girls, uh, I mean ladies. :-) its 1120 already and I don't have to worry about getting up at 3:30 a.m. lol. its been awhile since I've had an actual morning off. it's awesome! thank you universe for letting this happen. O:-)

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