Monday, July 16

Moving on

I know that's it's been only 6 months (this week) since Renee/Rain passed on, but as of a few weeks ago, I decided it was time to put myself out there. I know I'll never replace her, because she was my soul-mate/best friend/etc, etc, etc, but I am lonely for adult, female companionship. I honestly believe it's more lonely than horny though (I won't have sex with someone just because I'm lonely), there has to be an emotional connection before sex, it's the way it's always been for me. Could be that I'm afraid of rejection from a 'stranger' though. LOL. Anyway, long story short, I opened up a profile on okCupid.com. Mostly because I was bored one evening (hence the amount of questions I've already answered (over 1,000). lol), but also just to see if sites like that actually work, since I have the aforementioned fear of rejection in-person. Anyway, I met with a 55 year old woman whose name is also Renee'. Yes, I was weirded out when I found out her name was the same as my now deceased wife's (after 3 days of email, and on the day before we met), and she's the same age. Que twilight-zone music! I went out (or whatever you call lunch at Wendy's at 2 in the afternoon) with her twice. Before parting after the first meeting, she told me "just to make sure there's no misunderstanding, this was NOT a date", I told her I understood. Then a few days later she asked me to lunch at the same Wendy's, but wrote the day before that it still wasn't a date, just friends meeting for lunch, which I was still fine with, as there was no 'spark'. I haven't communicated with her since and it's been over 2 weeks. Last week another older lady asked me out. We went to dinner at Chili's, talked, and got along well. Last Friday she asked if I'd go to a nightclub that she used to like, with her, and I agreed. We got there at 7 p.m and left about 1 a.m. We both had a good time, a few beers, walked to the car, and she drove me home and said good night. I haven't heard from her since Saturday night/Sunday morning. At the club the music was so loud, there was no dance floor, so we just sat and listened. Which is fine, because I wasn't physically attracted to her anyway. okCupid has sent me a couple of notices saying there are other matches, but I haven't went and looked at them. When I feel the need I will, not because they think I should. LOL. I have met one other woman on okCupid. We get along pretty well via email/site messages, but haven't gone out yet. I think I've found her on Facebook (with her permission), but since I've already sent 'friend requests' to 3 people whom obviously weren't her, I'm waiting for her to confirm that she's the one in the profile picture, in the clothes she described to me (colors), before requesting the FB Friend thingy.

Other than that, I've been doing the usual life stuff and my online school at ITT Tech ONLINE. DD starts orientation at Target on Wednesday morning. DS is doing okay too.

That's all I've got. Bye.

What have YOU been up to? Hm? 

3 comments:

They are not aware said...

Computer dating...I don't really know what to say about that.
It is good that you are moving on with living. It can be hard.
Rain would not want you to be lonely either. So don't feel any guilt about that. Okay? Not that you said anything about that but, I know you and you have more than likely been agonizing over it a bit already.

Lee said...

My sisterinlaw is in a relationship that started through computer dating and she is really happy. Good luck; you deserve happiness and I know Rain would want you to be happy.

Todd said...

Tana: I don't know what to say about Internet dating either, except that I've met 2 women already, and although they weren't "the one", it was good to meet them. As for the guilt, yes, I've agonized over it, but like you said, Renee' would not want me to be lonely.

Lee: The 2 women I've met both have friends who also met online. One is married and happy, the other in a happy relationship.

Thank you both for commenting.